The Last Layer
by Slave2Writing
Summary: Bellatrix died at The Battle of Hogwarts. So why has she woken up the morning of, with memories of everything that has happened? Based on 'Groundhog's Day', Bellatrix has to figure out why she's been forced to relive the worst and last day of her life.
1. Prologue, Chapter 1

**Prologue**

It was like… being aware. Every atom, each finger, toe, strand of hair, the patch of skin between her neck and her chest – everything was felt. Connected.

Her mouth never came. She tried stretching it open but there was nothing to stretch. She knew she had eyes because she could _see_ the darkness. It was thick, it was deep, and encased her whole body. She felt all of it, pressing against her. Seeping in – she _was_ the darkness. She felt the familiar vibrations in her chest, rising to her throat, buzzing within, demanding to be released. But no scream, nothing. Not even a whimper could get out. She couldn't even take a breath.

And then suddenly, she was cold. And stiff. She felt so cold. And she couldn't see, couldn't hear, couldn't think. And then suddenly, green. All she could see. A green light straining at her, tearing at her, so much pain, but it was leaving. Leading away from her somehow. She felt something move. Something apart of her. Her mouth! Yes, she was… laughing. She felt it resounding throughout her body. Why was she laughing? Her arm was outstretched. Pointing towards… a Weasley. The Weasley woman. Everything felt forced. Controlled. Slow. Every detail passing through her eyes. And then… speed.

Molly Weasley pushing past her daughter, the mudblood, the dope blonde; Weasley running; the mudblood firing a spell… faster now. Even faster.

Pushing past Hogwarts gates; approaching Hogwarts gates. The wind felt wrong somehow. She felt wrong. Leaving the forest; running through the forest. Why were the chants leaving her ear? Come back, come back!

Harry Potter dead; Voldemort on the ground, her breath on his pale cheek; Harry Potter alive; Harry Potter approaching; Harry Potter revealed… but he was dead a second ago. What was happening? She was going backwards…

With Voldemort; apparating; mark burning; pacing the manor; Cissy's frantic mutterings; third swig of a bottle; second swig of the bottle; first swig of the bottle; Lucius locking the liquor cabinet, this was her whole day.

Walking down the stairs; opening her door; rolling out of bed; waking up in bed; sleep.

* * *

**Chapter One**

She opened her eyes slowly. She sat up slowly. She pushed off the covers. She stood up. She headed toward the mirror. She gazed into the mirror. Slow. And most importantly, all in a forward motion. The world was right.

"A bad dream." She murmured to her reflection. "An anxiety dream."

But what had she to be anxious about? She hadn't had a nightmare since, well, Azkaban. But before Azkaban, when she had only been a child, her nightmares were vague. Clearly the fantastical concoctions of an eight year old who had disobeyed daddy's orders and read the horror book she shouldn't have. But this dream, this nightmare, was so detailed. Like the ones in Azkaban. Only those were memories, clear and painful, and pulled to the forefront of her mind.

"Bella? Bella are you up yet?"

But these weren't memories. They couldn't be. Nothing had happened yet. Harry Potter wasn't dead – yet.

"Bella? Bella, _please_. Are you up?"

Her lord was alright. And she was alright.

"Bella! I need to talk to you."

She took one glance at her reflection before taking a deep breath. _Compose yourself._ She strode toward the door and turned the knob. She turned away even as she opened the door and settled back on the bed.

"Close the door behind you, will you Cissy?"

"Of course." Narcissa hissed.

Bellatrix raised an eyebrow as her sister knelt in front of her. Her arms weighing on her lap.

"Bella, I need to talk to you." She repeated.

"So you've said. Well?"

Narcissa swallowed thickly. Bellatrix started to feel a little tense. She wasn't close to many people, but Cissy was one of those few. If something was wrong… but of course something was wrong. Cissy's life of late wasn't as charmed as she had grown accustomed to.

"Cissy, what is it?"

"I – I want to come."

"Come? Come where?"

"With you. To the b-battle."

"What? Why would you want to -?"

"My baby, Bellatrix!" Her sister's nails pierced her sides as she raised herself at eye level. "I need to be there. I need to be there for Draco."

Bella felt something stir in her mind. Her memory. Why was this conversation so familiar? Had Cissy begged before?

"Why are you coming to me? What could I do? Why not ask –?"

"Lucius?" Cissy laughed humorlessly. "He can't worry about me and his son. I understand." And Bellatrix found herself startled to see her sister's eyes tearing up. "But I have to go, Bella. I _have_ to go. And you, you're the Dark Lord's favorite. I know you are. I know he'd listen to you."

This all felt familiar. Cissy begging. Flattering her. This had all happened. And what she'd do next, it had already happened.

"I'll do my best, Cissy."

"Oh!" Cissy grabbed Bellatrix in a crushing hug.

"Ugh. Cissy, please!"

"Oh, Bella! I knew I could count on you. Thank you, thank you!"

She pulled away and placed a kiss on her sister's cheek. A whispered, "Thank you." And she was out the door.

Bellatrix stared as she went. It wasn't that she wasn't used to affection from her sister. But that kiss, that particular kiss… she placed a hand on her cheek. The kiss seemed fixed. A layer upon a layer. Hadn't this occurred? Hadn't that kiss been placed? She closed her eyes and fell back gently onto the bed. An image was weaving into her mind. Cissy's lips pressing against her cheek. It happened not a minute ago. But why did it feel like a lifetime ago?

"I need a drink." She muttered to herself.

* * *

She entered the living room when Lucius was just leaving. The liquor cabinet was locked tight. Lucius walked with a distinct jingle from beneath his robes.

"Morning." He mumbled as he passed.

"Morning." She said.

She waited until he was down the hall before casting '_alohamora_.'

"Oh, that's good." She leaned on the mantle as the bitter liquid ran down her throat. She took another swig of the bottle before casting her eyes over the pictures. Cissy had plenty of pictures of herself on the mantle. Cissy as a precious baby, as a toddler, as a schoolgirl. Bellatrix picked up one of her and Cissy from years back. It was her fifth year and Cissy's first. Cissy was smiling brightly in the picture though Bellatrix knew how nervous she was. She could remember Cissy's small hand clutching her own. Her nails piercing her skin. Just like earlier today. Begging for her son. Bellatrix sighed before glancing at the smudge moving next to her picture self. Cissy had tried cursing the blood traitor off of all the pictures they'd shared together. That was a lot of pictures. Bellatrix had simply thrown them all out.

She placed the picture back on the mantelpiece.

"For you, Cissy." She promised to the smiling schoolgirl. "I'll try."

* * *

"You wanted to see me, Bella?"

She bowed down and touched the hem of his robes to her lips.

"Yes, my lord. Thank you for speaking with me."

"This is a very important day for me, Bella." Her master's voice hissed. "I do not wish to waste my time with matters of no importance."

She licked her lips nervously. _You better appreciate this, Cissy. _"My lord, I wish to make a request. Not for myself but for my sister, Narcissa."

"I know who your sister is, Bellatrix. Or did you suppose I might assume you were talking about the blood traitor whom you've failed to kill."

"My lord, I would never –"

"You've also failed to kill her husband, the mudblood; and their daughter and _her_ husband, the werewolf. Tell me, Bellatrix, what makes you think that you deserve a request from me?"

She bowed her head away from his angry gaze. The red beams piercing her as harshly as Cissy's nails. _Cissy believes that I hold the Dark Lord's ear. And despite his present anger, this feels familiar. This feels… passing._ Another image conjured in her mind. A response seemed to rumble inside her chest, pressing through her mouth.

"Forgive me, my lord. I have failed. But my sister is a great witch of prestigious skill, though she does not display it often. She can be a great asset to our cause. Especially on this day." _You would not speak to me if you were angry. You would not hear me at all._

"You think I need help?"

Bellatrix kept her mouth shut. Her lord began to twist his wand in his hands.

"She may join us, Bella." She breathed a sigh of relief. _Cissy will be happy. _"But if she gets in my way, it will be on your head."

She rose and bowed as she exited. "Thank you, my lord."

_Don't worry, my sister is fully capable.

* * *

_

They sat in the living room staring at the fire. Lucius' hands were gripped on the arms of his chair. His jaw set for hours. He hadn't glanced once at Bellatrix or at his wife. Rodolphus was sipping brandy, fingering his wedding band. Bellatrix was stroking her left arm absentmindedly. She was watching her sister frantically pacing around the room, tapping her wand at her thighs. Sparks were flying but she wasn't paying any mind.

"Mm." Bellatrix shut her eyes as a double vision entered them. Cissy pacing. She saw her now, and she saw her then. Frantic pacing. A layer upon a layer.

"Are you alright, love?" Rodolphus stood in front of her.

She looked up but was saved from answering.

"It's time." Lucius said, as their arms burned. He put his arm around his wife's waist. "Let's go." He turned them both in place and they were gone.

Bellatrix started to turn but was stopped by her husband.

"Are you sure you're alright?"

"Yes, Rod." She pulled away from him. "I'm fine."

He searched her face. She sighed and took his hand. "You know we can't be late. Let's just get this blood bath started."

He nodded and they turned in place together.

* * *

"My friends," Lord Voldemort's cold voice was soft but clear. "Tonight is the night."

They all stood silently, shivering against the cool breeze but made no motion to warm themselves. Voldemort's voice kept them flushed, a promise of a battle. Action.

"Tonight we make history. Tonight starts a glorious campaign and in the end, after we have won, after we have proven our worth, our might, every witch and wizard will know our names. And they will know why we have made the hard decisions we've made. And the world will be pure."

"_And our children will be safe."_

Bellatrix heard the words a second before he spoke them. She had heard this speech before. _What is this? I can't be going mad the night of the biggest fight of my life! What is wrong with me?_

"It is time." Voldemort's coat swished as he turned around, his piercing eyes directed at Hogwarts. "We begin."

"Love," Lucius whispered quietly. "You have to stop shaking."

Narcissa stood in between him and Bellatrix, shaking uncontrollably.

"Cissy, stop it." Bellatrix ordered. "What would our lord do if he saw you like this?"

Narcissa visibly struggled as she attempted to steady her breathing. Bellatrix wrapped an arm around her waist as Lucius stroked her hand. It struck them both that this was the most contact between them, as it had always been. Narcissa had always been the one to keep the family together. Always the intermediary between parent and child, sister and sister, cousin and cousin, father and son, husband and sister – in – law. Both Bellatrix and Lucius looked straight ahead, the death eaters rounded a half circle with Voldemort in the muddle, a throne among the forest trunks and pebbles. Stars winking above with Mars shining more brightly than ever. Bellatrix and Lucius stared straight ahead, their Cissy trembling between them, longing for their youngest. A cub strayed from the pack. Alone. They stared straight ahead, touching only through Narcissa and they knew. This was what they were fighting for.

They waited. And they waited. Voldemort's warning faded but etched in their minds.

_I know that you are preparing to fight. Your efforts are futile. You cannot fight me. I do not want to kill you. I have great respect for the teachers of Hogwarts. I do not want to spill any magical blood._

_Give me Harry Potter, and none shall be harmed. Give me Harry Potter, and I shall leave the school untouched. Give me Harry Potter, and you will be rewarded._

_You have until midnight._

Bellatrix shut her mind, ignoring the thoughts threatening to burst. _I've heard this before._

They waited. And then they waited. Until finally, DING. Midnight.

"Their choice," The Dark Lord said. "My faithful…"

"Advance!"

* * *

Running fast, feet flying, wind blowing through the air, and Hogwarts Castle loomed above as she broke through the last leaves of the forest. No thinking, just running. And soon…

"Crucio!" Her battle cry hit someone, she didn't care who. Suddenly she was everywhere, back in her beloved castle, her kingdom. The Queen had returned.

She ran among the throngs, hitting anything that moved. Her wand lashing out, she ducked spells, and ran around winding stairs and halls she once so well knew.

_I'm back._

"Stupe – aargh!"

She followed the cry and turned around just in time to see one of their giants' hands smashing through the window. She didn't try to stop her laugh. This felt so… nice. _This _was a battle. A real fight. Utter chaos but she'd come back on top. Queen of Chaos. And her lord would take notice. And her lord would know.

"Avada Kedavra!" A man fell at her feet and she walked on.

All around her splinters of wood flew, shouts, thundering, shrieks for help. She breathed it in. She just knew she was going to win.

"_You have fought valiantly. Lord Voldemort knows how to value bravery. Yet you have sustained heavy losses. If you continue to resist me, you will all die, one by one. I do not wish this to happen. Every drop of magical blood spilled is a lost and a waste. Lord Voldemort is merciful. I command my forces to retreat immediately._

_You have one hour. Dispose of your dead with dignity. Treat your injured._

_I speak now, Harry Potter, directly to you. You have permitted your friends to die for you rather than face me yourself. I shall wait for one hour in the Forbidden Forest. If, at the end of that hour, you have not come to me, have not given yourself up, then battle recommences. This time, I shall enter the fray myself, Harry Potter, and I shall find you, and I shall punish every last man, woman, and child who has tried to conceal you from me. One hour."_

They were called back. She was reluctant to leave but the mark was burning. She, her fellow death eaters, the enormous spiders, the giants, and the dementors (she stayed clear of them) swarmed back into the forest, gathering around their lord. Tied by ropes to a tree stood the buffoon Hagrid. Helpless but not yet dead.

The whispers started. A pulse running through them all. Lucius had seen him last, had delivered a message to his friend, sent him to Voldemort. And now, Snape was dead.

_Snape, Snape, Snape._ The pulse beat through them all.

Something was wrong. Snape was dead? She wasn't exactly his greatest fan, actually she hated the man, but still. He was one of the dark lord's favorites. How could he have been so easily disposed of?

Lucius looked much paler than usual. She knew Voldemort hadn't let him join the fight. Which meant he hadn't had a chance to look for Draco. Draco…

"Cissy," she whispered to her sister. "Why wasn't Draco with the other Slytherins?"

Her sister shook her head imperceptibly and stared straight ahead. Cold and unfeeling.

"Cissy?" Bella breathed, her plead barely reaching her sister.

Narcissa was saved from answering by Voldemort's motion. Bella's eyes snapped to his form as he raised his head to address the two men joining the group.

"No sign of him, my Lord." Dolohov spoke as he and Yaxley sat down.

Voldemort stared at a space in the middle of their little clearing. Suddenly a fire erupted in the middle. Some fell back as it cackled, but not Bellatrix.

"My Lord," she whispered tenderly, but let her voice trail off as he raised his hand. Across from her, Rodolphous stirred.

Voldemort muttered something to himself. Yet it was clear. Or it should have been. She heard the words but, _no not now. I can't take it now._

Voldemort talking, and someone else. Someone was here. She looked away from her master. _Here._ She tried to focus. She saw too many things. Fog, a haze, a distortion in their frames. Where was…?

"…I was, it seems… mistaken."

"_No you weren't!"_

Bellatrix leaped off the ground excitedly, arm pointing in the direction of the boy, a second before he revealed himself. No one knew where to look. At Bellatrix looking surprised at herself, Harry Potter afraid and staring at both her and Voldemort, and Voldemort staring at both Bellatrix and Harry Potter.

"Well," he said slowly, getting up. Harry Potter stood shaking, staring him in the eyes. "The Boy Who Lived."

They stood there. Man and boy. Until the man's weapon slashed the air. And they were both no more.

* * *

Bellatrix ran. She ran fast, her heart pounding, her skin scraping across every obstacle she met as she tried to get away. _Get away._

Get away because this was a nightmare she was repeating. Get away because she had seen Voldemort fall before. Had seen Harry Potter reveal himself once more. Had fought this battle, had done everything.

She needed to do something different. Something new. So she ran.

The forest ran for miles, it was so easy to get lost but she didn't care. She needed this release.

_Not enough. Scream._

She screamed as she ran, head pounding and her chest held no strength but still she screamed. Hours went by. Hours. Hours as Hogwarts Castle burned behind her, as her master fell. Hours until she finally collapsed, gasping for air. Hours. And then…

"Bella? Bella are you up yet?"


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

Okay, this was wrong.

"Bella? Bella, _please_. Are you up?"

Bellatrix stared at the door, watching as the knob shook, evidence that the woman on the other side of the door was straining to get in. But she had already gotten in. She'd been here, she'd lowered herself upon Bella's knees and begged.

"Bella! I need to talk to you!"

Every word. Every syllable pronounced exactly the same way. The same day.

She. Was. Freaking. Out.

"Just go away!" she yelled. "Leave me alone!"

"Bellatrix, I don't have time for this. Let. Me. In."

She sighed happily as something new was spoken. Lunging at the door she grasped a startled blonde into her room and entrapped her in a crushing hug.

"Bella!"

"Oh, Cissy, yes!"

"Y-yes?"

"Yes, whatever you want. I'll convince the Dark Lord to let you come, so you can find Draco. Only don't say anything right now, okay? Don't say anything."

She stared into her sister's blue eyes, so unlike her own. Stared so deeply that she didn't really see her, only blue oceans. Like the ones they had flown over together. Her, Cissy, and the blood traitor. Waves spraying over them, soaking them, drenching their clothes, and she and the blood traitor watched their youngest sister warily, but she had surprisingly enjoyed the ride as much as they did.

Narcissa looked astonished that her sister was still holding her. Forget the fact that she had practically read her mind, Bellatrix Lestrange never hugged _anybody._

"Bella…" Narcissa spoke hesitantly, unsure if she was allowed to speak.

"Cissy, something dreadful is happening." Bella's voice was low, and set her sister's hairs on end. "I'm not sure how to fix it but I will okay? I promise you."

Her hands crept up Narcissa's shoulders to grasp her head. "I _promise_." Then she kissed her sister's cheek and stalked out.

* * *

"Lucius!" she greeted brightly. "Hello."

Lucius stared at her as she passed him into the foyer. She headed toward the locked cabinet and made to open it.

"Hey!" Lucius grabbed her arm, glowering. "It's locked for a reason, Bella."

"_Believe_ me, Lucius." She said. "I really need this drink."

He leaned in and sniffed her breath. Although usually he would have earned a jinx for that, Bella was just glad for the refreshing change of pace.

"You seem as if you've already had one."

Bella laughed. "Yeah, I thought I had too, but I guess I was wrong." She ignored his questioning look and twisted her arm out of his grip. "Anyway, what do you care? You should try locking up your wife, not the liquor cabinet."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"I mean," she cast a quick '_alohamora_' and sought out her bottle. "Dear Cissy wishes to be part of the party the Dark Lord is throwing. I told her I'd get her in."

Lucius face was livid. Seething. Mad. Bella relished this… newness.

"Drink?" She offered the bottle sweetly.

* * *

_Okay, so obviously I'm crazy out of my mind insane. That's fine, that Azkaban shit was bound to hit me at some point._

_But, I don't really feel all that crazy. A little crazy. But, mostly I just feel fucked around. Aaargh. I hate being fucked around!_

Bellatrix paused in her thoughts, and then laughed to herself.

_Okay, not quite true._

She continued walking until she got to her master's temporary hideout. Just for tonight. Tomorrow the wizarding world would be his. There would be no need for hiding. Except of course...

_I've seen him fail. Myself fail. We lose._

"Stop it!" She hissed furiously to herself, leaning against the wall. She clenched her eyes tightly, wishing the thoughts away. Refusing the images. Her beloved master on the ground, herself falling, Molly Weasely's beet red face shouting furiously at her. Turning as she fell, watching her master screaming. She remembered so clearly her panic. And a thought, meant to be her last, pathetically worming its way to the forefront of her mind, lodged into eternity, _I hope he'll miss me._

"Ugh!" She banged the wall with all her might. _But that wasn't my last thought was it? I didn't die, I'm right here and everything else is a mistake. Today never happened before. Today is today and I'm just crazy. Tomorrow won't be today, tomorrow will be tomorrow. And tomorrow the Dark Lord will take over the Wizarding World._

She took a deep breath, and straightened up. Raising her left arm in a salute, she turned around and passed through the wall. Ready to repeat the entire grueling process over again.

* * *

She could never not be in awe of her master, but after hearing his speech for the third time, she couldn't help but being a little less than roused.

_Just let the battle begin. Please, please, please, let me bash somebody._

While they waited around for Midnight to strike, Narcissa pulled her sister aside.

"Why did you tell Lucius I wanted to join?" she asked furiously, her hand tight on her sister's arm.

"You did." Bella replied.

"You made it sound as if I wanted to join in one of your games! If you had just let me explain–"

" – that he's your baby. You need to be there. You need to be there for Draco."

Narcissa blinked. "Well… yes." Her grip lessened. "You should have let me tell Lucius. I could have explained to him more gently–"

" – that you understand he can't worry about you and his son. But that you have to go. And you asked my help because I'm the Dark Lord's favorite and you know he listens to me."

"Well… I wouldn't say you're his _favorite._" She let go Bella's arm. "I guess you're well valued."

Bella frowned. "You _don't_ believe I'm his favorite?" _So you show your true colors at last._

Narcissa shook her head and laughed. "Since when are you so perceptive to what I'm thinking? About Lucius and Draco I mean. Earlier this morning, you didn't even need me to ask for this favor. You just… knew."

She shrugged. "Maybe I'm reading your mind. I'm a formidable legilimens."

"Nah, you're way too self involved to care what other people are thinking."

"Narcissa Malfoy thinks _I'm_ narcissistic?"

They laughed. The war was approaching, Draco was going to be caught up in it, she could see her master falling, could see herself falling, but still she laughed.

_If, for some god forsaken reason I have to repeat this day, I'll relive this moment, Cissy. I'll make it last longer.

* * *

_

She didn't hesitate. Midnight had struck, her master had cried for the war to begin, so she began it. The ground thundered as she weaved through giants' legs. With a swipe of her wand, a flurry of curses, Hogwarts was open to her.

She figured it out. It was so simple. Obviously some higher being was giving her a chance to redeem herself. She failed her lord and now she was meant to repeat this day over and over until she won. Until they won. She had to win, or she'd never move on. Never leave today. Today would always be tomorrow. Always be yesterday. And always she would lose.

"Crucio!" an opponent crumbled at her feet.

She laughed, then kicked the filth aside. She meant to continue down the hall but then paused. Ahead of her was the thickest part of battle. Where she had headed before. Where she had battled aurors, and the other resisters of the new regime. Where she had, perhaps, _wasted_, time dueling and killing.

She turned to look behind her at the spiraling staircase before her. _Newness. No more layers. Choose a different path._

Suddenly her master's voice entered the castle walls. Calling back for his followers. For her.

"…_I command my forces to retreat immediately."_

Her mark was burning again. She saw herself, facing the staircase, and another of before… this day. Of the first day that was today. Feeling the mark burn, backing away from the duel, lust for battle losing out to loyalty to her master. She saw both. Facing the stairs, backing away.

"_I shall wait for one hour in the Forbidden Forest."_

Cissy's lips pressed against her cheek. Cissy pacing back and forth. Lucius locking the liquor cabinet. Her master's eyes boring into her own. Her master falling. Harry Potter emerging from the darkness. A green light pressing towards her.

"_One hour."_

She raised her wand in front of her and headed up the stairs, never more unsure in her life.

_On the bright side, if the Dark Lord kills me for defying him, I can always just relive this day.

* * *

_

Bellatrix sighed as she walked down the fifth floor. The battle hadn't yet reached here. Everything was still relatively untouched. She wasn't quite sure what she was looking for, but she had to do _something_. Something different.

"Well, nothing here." She mumbled. She twisted her wand in her hands. _Of course I don't know what'll be the difference between nothing and something._ "Nowhere to go but up." She climbed the stairs to the sixth floor.

"Finally." She hissed. Students were running around frantically. Casting spells under Flitwick's guidance.

"Good." The short wizard said. "Head up, set yourselves by Ravenclaw Tower. When the Death Eaters come we can fire from above."

Bellatrix snorted. Like that'd stop them. She watched, crouched low on the stairs, as the young fighters headed in the opposite direction. She waited a minute, then -

"_Muffliato."_

Flitwick opened his mouth to yell but Bellatrix knew his voice wouldn't carry past the sixth floor.

"It's a pity," she hissed, disarming him in one fluid motion. "Only I'll be able to hear your pleads for mercy."

Flitwick tried to run, but her cruciatus hit him square in the back. He convulsed on the floor, his normally squeaky voice taken to an all new high pitch. She so badly wanted to drink in his screams, but this wasn't helping her master.

"I'm not usually this rude." She said, lifting the curse. She kicked him over, so he was facing her on the floor. "But I'm going to have to cut this short."

His eyes widened in fear.

"_Avada Kedavra."_

And Professor Flitwick was dead.

She stared at him in surprise. He had died rather… softly. Like a baby taking a breath. _I suppose because he's so little._ She shook her head, clearing away the odd thoughts. Still, this was her old professor. He had taught her charms. It was a little odd.

She walked away, heading back toward the stairs. The students she had seen were heading toward Ravenclaw Tower, which meant she couldn't be seen anywhere on the sixth floor.

_Nowhere to go but up._

She gave one more glance to her old professor, seemingly resting on the cold marble floor. Suddenly she remembered, _Snape must be dead as well._

How odd. Earlier this day, Snape was alive, yet she remembered them whispering of his death. If she failed again, forced to repeat this day again, she'd have to remember to ask him why the Dark Lord wanted him dead.

The seventh floor was just as silent as the fifth. Bellatrix couldn't stop the bubble of frustration from exploding out of her. It had started within her chest, burning hotter and hotter, consuming her, until it ripped past her lips.

Her scream bounced along the seventh floor walls, recklessly flying loose through the air. She collapsed to her knees, seeking release. Yet, as her wail ebbed away she found one small part of gratification.

_At least this is different._

She stood up, smoothed out her clothes. Started pacing the hall. _God, I wish I knew what I was looking for._ Her wand tapping against her thigh. _I've been brought back again. The first time after I died, the second time after I ran from my lord and Potter. Why? _By now her lord would think her dead, detained, or for some reason defying him. _I just need something to help him- me- us._ Images of Cissy came into her mind. She was doing this for her as well. And for Draco. And in some small, unexplainable way, for her husband and Lucius too. For them all.

_I just need to find something to help. Something to answer me why. Why have I – _?

Bellatrix froze mid pace. The wall she was standing in front of was inexplicably gone. In its place was a door. Unthinkingly, as though she were in a trance, Bellatrix pushed open the door.

It took her a full minute for her eyes to adjust to the huge light burning into her eyes. She saw glass… and sand. She couldn't comprehend, it was all too confusing. And too, too bright. She almost didn't register the Mudblood pointing her wand at her, clearly frightened, a green light emerging from her wand and rushing towards Bellatrix.

She gasped and shot up. The mudblood's face was clear in her mind, only a few feet away… but Bellatrix felt the softness of the mattress and recognized her surroundings as her room in Malfoy Manor.

"Shit." She fell back onto the bed, ignoring her sister's urgent calls, right on cue.

"Bella! I need to talk to you!"

The _mudblood_ had killed her.


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note: ...so, yeah. It's been awhile. I have a million different excuses for why I've not updated and the best one is WRITER'S BLOCK! AARGH! I wrote like a million different versions to this chapter and ended up on settling with the one I wrote in the first place! haha joke's on me. plus real life SUCKS. actually, it's all right. i like life, i love life :) but sometimes i need to escape it. and that's why i have fanfiction. :) i want to say that my updates will come in more frequently but... *sigh* we'll see.**

**also, got really nice reviews from people and I'm terrible at replying to them so just wanted to say THANK YOU and I'll be better in the future. Promise.

* * *

**

**Chapter Three**

She had thought she had known the lust for blood. The ever present, ever ravenous desire to see someone hurt, to cry out in pain, knowing that the end was near and that they'd go out painfully until their time came. Until _she_ decided it came.

Running her fingers through her dark curls, she conceded that she had known vengeance. She had felt it when she spent all her energy going after Sirius, Andromeda's little half blood brat, and the aurors who tried to keep her lord from her.

And she had killed them, or worse, and caused them pain. And she had enjoyed it. And she had thought she knew. But _this_.

This burning inside of her. Greater than mere flames urging her on. Telling her to kill, kill, kill. This was destroying her. Searing her insides, forcing her to grit her teeth and try to mask the pain, but she couldn't. It twisted her face, distorting her features, and she couldn't breathe. The hatred, the anger, the need for the mudblood's filth to drip slowly out, until her entire heart was drained, blocking all entrances for oxygen to enter her.

Yes, she needed her to bleed. And not by the tip of her knife, this time. Not by silver strips crisscrossing over her skin, scarring her. Not by magic either. She needed to feel her own nails sinking into the mudblood's flesh. Tearing her apart inch by inch. Filth by filth.

"Bella! I need to talk to you."

Bellatrix strode to the door and flung it open, flashing her sister a sweet smile. "Yes, Narcissa, however may I be of service to you?"

Narcissa glared at her. "This is no time for fooling around, Bella. I have something serious to ask you."

Bellatrix rolled her eyes. "Well, before you do, I was wondering if you wanted to come to the battle with us."

"What I wanted, Bella, was to come to the battle with – wait, what?"

Narcissa looked confusedly at an impatient Bellatrix. "That's what I wanted to ask… why would you want me to come?"

"Well, you know, you need to be there for Draco, you can't worry about your baby alone at home, blah, blah, blah. I don't really care, Cissy. You coming or not?" She already knew the answer of course and pushed past her sister. "I'll confirm with the Dark Lord, right now. Make sure you tell Lucius."

* * *

Bellatrix masked her thoughts as well as she could when she bent down to press her lips against the hem of Lord Voldemort's robes. She had never felt bored in his presence, but this was the fourth time she had to ask a request she already knew – not only the answer – but also the conversation to.

"This is a very important day for me, Bella. I do not wish to waste my time with matters of no importance."

"My lord, I wish to make a request. Not for myself but for my sister, Narcissa." _I'll start with that hair of hers. Grab a fistful and yank hard. Grip it tight, wind it, and pull, pull, pull. I'll make her scream, I'll make her writhe._

"I know who your sister is, Bellatrix. Or did you suppose I might assume you were talking about the blood traitor who you've failed to kill."

Bellatrix tuned in, in time to say, "My lord, I would never –" before allowing him to interrupt. _I'll run my hands all over that flesh and twist; harder and harder until she's shining red. And when she cries and begs me to stop I'll spit on her face and laugh._

"You've also failed to kill her husband, the mudblood; and their daughter and _her_ husband, the werewolf. Tell me, Bellatrix, what makes you think that you deserve a request from me?"

Recognizing her cue, Bellatrix arranged her features in an emotion more suitable for the occasion. "Forgive me, my lord. I have failed. But my sister is a great witch of prestigious skill, though she does not display it often. She can be a great asset to our cause. Especially on this day."

"You think I need help?" Bellatrix waited bor – er, patiently. "She may join us, Bella. But if she gets in my way, it will be on your head."

She rose and bowed as she exited. "Thank you, my lord." _No offense, my lord. But I have a murderous bitch occupying my mind and for once it's not me._

_

* * *

_

"_I know that you are preparing to fight. Your efforts are futile. You cannot fight me. I do not want to kill you. I have great respect for the teachers of Hogwarts. I do not want to spill any magical blood._

_Give me Harry Potter, and none shall be harmed. Give me Harry Potter, and I shall leave the school untouched. Give me Harry Potter, and you will be rewarded._

_You have until midnight._"

Bellatrix sat down, cross-legged, at the edge of the Forbidden Forest. Deeper in the woods her fellow Death Eaters waited anxiously for midnight to strike. Only Bellatrix knew that midnight had already struck. Again and again and again. And would do so again and again and again. Unless…

_Unless I kill the mudblood. _Yes, somehow, if she killed the mudblood everything would be all right. Everything would be clear.

Her eyes were fixed on the seventh floor of the castle, searching for a window to the room that wasn't really there. _I'll find you, mudblood. I'll tear you apart._

"Bella?" Narcissa's cool voice carried through the still air; air stuck still in time.

Bellatrix barely turned to acknowledge her sister as she sat herself behind her. Bellatrix continued to stare at the seventh floor, even as Narcissa wrapped her arms around her.

"_Nervous?_" Her whispered tease tingled the elder Black's ear.

"Hardly." Bellatrix answered.

Narcissa smiled against her sister's skin. "_Excited?_"

"More than you can imagine."

"I can imagine. This is a once in a lifetime battle. Nothing like this has ever happened before." Bellatrix held back a snort and merely nodded. "A siege on Hogwarts Castle… and to think, for seven years this was our home."

Bellatrix stiffened. "Don't think about it that way, Cissy. We're reclaiming it. We're saving our home, not attacking it." She felt her sister's heartbeat as Narcissa pressed her chest closer to her back. Her arms tightened around her waist. Bellatrix placed her own arms around Narcissa's, and laid her head back to rest against her sister's chest, burrowing it in the crook of her neck, her eyes never straying from the seventh floor.

"You always made war sound beautiful, Bella. But do me one favor."

"What?"

"Don't forget about Draco, okay? He doesn't see the world as you do. This might destroy him… even if he survives. Even if he lives."

"He will, Cissy. He's strong."

"Stronger men than him have fallen in lesser battles. Bella, please…" At once her eyes left the seventh floor and Bellatrix turned to look at her youngest sister, whose cold blue eyes were shining with unshed tears. "Don't forget."

* * *

Midnight had struck. Somewhere, deeper in the forest, Bellatrix knew Voldemort had given the order to advance. But she was already there, flying at Hogwarts castle, her feet barely skimming the ground as she hurled herself, wand raised and a battle cry her one warning. And only one thought occupying her mind.

_Get to the mudblood._

Her wand slashed through the air and people fell. Behind her the giants approached, their heavy thumps reverberating throughout her heart. Her fellow Death Eaters joined in the fight but in the midst of the battle all faces blended into one and she simply sent curses flying after whoever got in her way.

_Go up the staircase._

The same people she'd killed yesterday (tomorrow – today – whatever) weren't there before. There were new people to shout 'crucio' at and knock down the stairs.

"You!" A man gasped, his wand raised in shaking hands.

Bellatrix rolled her eyes. "I just hate fans." She sent a stinging hex at his eyes. "But I'll sign my name anyway." With a few slashes the letter 'B' was etched on his face with crude markings. "No need to thank me." He screamed in agony as his eyes watered up and he clutched his face in his hands. Bellatrix grasped a fistful of his robes and pulled him down, letting him fall down the stairs behind her.

The winding staircase was clear and she took a moment to pause and listen to the screams of her victim. _Some art you just can't recreate. This has to be enjoyed now._

She continued on. Third floor… fourth floor… fifth floor… sixth floor…

She took a peak before moving on. _Catch you next time, professor._

Seventh floor. Bellatrix strolled through, her wand gripped tightly in her hand as she remained alert. But so far the battle was being fought in the lower levels. She relaxed slightly and made her way to the tapestry of Barnabas the Barmy. She faced the wall opposite it.

_Okay… how do I find the door?_ She had been so focused on what she wanted to do to the mudblood (_tear her apart, rip her in half, kill! kill! kill!_) that she hadn't even thought about how to get into that room again. _What did I do, before?_

She started pacing again. Back and forth in front of the blank wall that was mocking her. Taunting her. Denying her. She wanted to scream. _Oh wait, I did scream. _She was unwilling to do it again and betray her position. _Unless, maybe screaming opens the door?_ She seriously doubted it. She continued pacing. Back and forth. Back and forth.

_It just opened last time. It was a room like I've never seen before. All light and sand and she was there. The filth was there and I know she's there now. I need to be in that room. I need to be there. I need to see the light and sand and understand and kill that filthy, dirty, mudblood bi – _

"Woah." Bellatrix gaped as a door suddenly appeared in front of her. She stared at it for a second before walking toward it. Her hand wrapped around the knob and she started to twist but then suddenly stopped.

_She's there. What if she kills me again?_ Bellatrix started to tremble, as a self-loathing for herself suddenly sprang up. _You were already killed by a housewife, are you really going to walk in there and let a mudblood kill you twice?_ And just as suddenly, another thought sprang up. _Are you going to run away? Again?_ She took a deep breath and raised her wand. _I'm no coward. I am not weak. I am a Black."_ She twisted the knob, and pressed open the door.

Once again, a bright light invaded her vision. Bellatrix clasped her eyes shut, but unlike before she did not leave herself open to attack.

"PROTEGO!" Her shield went up as she crouched down low, waiting for the light to ebb and for a curse to fly her way. Behind her the door banged shut. Slowly she opened her eyes. She was alone. She stood up and looked around the room, taking her shield down. There was only one thing her eyes could be drawn to.

_What is it?_

She approached it wonderingly, abandoning all caution. _It's so… big._ It took her a moment to realize exactly what she was looking at. The entire room was empty save for the cool stonewalls and floor, and the huge hourglass that stretched from the floor to the ceiling. It was about double the size of Bellatrix herself and three times as wide. She had thought at first glance that it was all glass but when she tilted her head to the side, a bit of gold glinted off the sides. Sand trickled down but after closer inspection, Bellatrix saw that neither the pile losing nor the pile gaining sand changed in its amount.

Bellatrix pressed her hands against the glass and stared as the sand continued to trickle down. A million questions were lodged in her mind and began to trickle out as fast and as uselessly as the sand.

_What does this mean? Why am I the only one to realize this is happening? Where's the mudblood? What does she have to do with this? What do I have to do with this? What should I do now?_

She had more questions but it was at that moment when she was just about ready to break down that at least one of her questions was answered. In the dim reflection of the glass, the knob began to turn.

Bellatrix gripped her wand and spun around. The door opened. Bellatrix stood there, a mirthless smile on her face as she raised her wand and prepared to mutter the curse. In the doorway Hermione Granger faced her with no wand in sight. Lord Voldemort's voice echoed throughout the castle.

"…_I command my forces to retreat immediately."_

Hermione looked at her in complete shock, barely acknowledging the wand pointed at her chest. "What – how are you here?"

A hot, boiling, feeling of utter rage erupted inside of Bellatrix and suddenly she saw red. She had absolutely no use for her wand. This anger ran deeper than magic, it was primal and needed to be satisfied. Within seconds she had thrown her wand aside and pounced on Hermione.

"Ungh!" Hermione grunted at the blunt force and the shock began to wear off. Bellatrix took her head in her hands and forcefully banged it against the door behind her. Hermione gasped in pain before her own hands sought out the older woman's neck. Bellatrix snarled in madness and bit the hand that was closest to her. Hermione screamed and brought her legs up to kick off the woman pinning her.

"Oof!" It was Bellatrix' turn to grunt. "You stupid…" She couldn't concentrate on insults. She couldn't concentrate on magic. She couldn't concentrate on the sand trickling through the enormous hourglass, its bright light playing on stone and on the struggling forms of the room's occupants. She couldn't even focus on the sound of her master's voice, demanding the temporary retreat of his forces, and of Harry Potter.

"_This time, I shall enter the fray myself, Harry Potter, and I shall find you, and I shall punish every last man, woman, and child who has tried to conceal you from me. One hour."_

Yes, one hour. An hour that would be repeated again and again and again and all because of this mudblood bitch. Somehow, Bellatrix knew. Somehow this was all _her _fault and it wouldn't be fixed unless Bellatrix fixed _her_.

Hermione fought to get away, the wand Bellatrix had tossed away was but three feet from her face. She raised her arm, strained to reach it, but Bellatrix was on her again.

_I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die._ Hermione began to spasm in panic as her torturer's face loomed above her own. Bellatrix pressed her arms to her sides and sat on her stomach.

"I don't know what you've been doing, filth." Her voice was laced in venom. Hermione couldn't stop the tears pouring from her eyes. Her body shook as she lay there helpless and awaiting death. "But consider this your comeuppance."

Hermione struggled, trying to twist out of Bellatrix' tight grip. "Please." She begged. "Please, don't."

A shriek of insane laughter assaulted her ears. "And did I have that choice, mudblood? Did you show me mercy?" She leaned closer, her nose an inch away from Hermione's trembling one. "I. Think. Not." She leaned away.

"What are you talking about?" Hermione cried, completely bewildered. "What have I done?"

"What have you done? What are you going to do? These days those questions mean the same thing. But not anymore. Tonight I'm finished with you. Tonight it ends. Tonight…" She raised a hand and curled it into a fist. "I win." She let the knuckle fall down, and closed her eyes waiting for the sweet impact of flesh.

"Bella? Bella are you up yet?"

No… something was wrong. The flesh felt like – Bella opened her eyes and gazed down at the pillow that had just engulfed her fist.

"Bella? Bella, _please_. Are you up?"

No… no, it couldn't be. She had her. She was so close. How could this have happened? Time hadn't run out. She hadn't died. She hadn't run away.

"Bella! I need to talk to you."

"OH FOR FUCK'S SAKE!" Again and again Bellatrix pounded the soft padding of the pillow. The stuffing began to tear and even after it had broken Bellatrix continued to pound away.

"Bella? Bella, what's going on? What are you doing?"

She pounded until she had practically gone through the pillow, until she had gone through the blanket and there was mattress. Mattress that she had to kill, had to attack, because obviously any miserable thing was viable to kill her nowadays.

"Bella! Bella, open up!"

But Bellatrix couldn't be satisfied with only the bed. Not when there was so much generously provided for her in the room. _Where's the glass?_

"That's it, Bella! Stand back because I'm coming in!"

Bellatrix rounded the bed and approached the mirror. Looking back at her was a mad woman. "Hello, lovely!" She greeted cheerily.

Behind her the door blasted open. Narcissa hurried in, before stopping in shock. "Bellatrix, what the hell happ – ah!"

Bellatrix shoved herself face first into the glass. Blood ran down her face as she slid slowly against the wall. _Stonewall. Stonewalls and floors and glass. Now blood._

"Bella!" Narcissa screamed and hurried toward her. "Lucius!" She shouted. "Lucius! Rodolphus!"

Bellatrix smiled wide, though it hurt even more do to the glass wedged in her mouth. "Don't worry, Cissy." She mumbled quietly before passing out. "It only hurts for a day. Then it's gone back to the beginning."


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer**: For the purposes of this story, I'm ignoring the fact that Bellatrix had her wand stolen by Hermione. However, Hermione did have her wand confiscated by the Snatchers.

Would also like to thank Inkfire for correcting my horrible horrible French. I would not recommend Yahoo translation for anyone.

* * *

**Chapter Four**

She felt heavy. A weight pressed down on her, pressing hard on her waist, her chest, her stomach. Her throat felt thick, full with some kind of liquid but she couldn't swallow. Her eyes were shut but when she opened them she still couldn't see. There was only darkness. And silence.

"Cissy?" She fought off the thick feeling in her throat, enough to call out for her sister. "Cissy?"

There was no answer. None of the usual calls of, 'Bella? Bella are you up?' The silence gave Bellatrix no relief though. It felt empty, and scary, and the first stirrings of true fear began to churn inside her belly, crawling up inside her chest where her heart began to hammer faster and faster.

"Cissy?"

The weight began to lift somewhat but Bellatrix was reluctant to get up. The darkness unnerved her; what she wouldn't give for a flicker of light. The surface she was on felt so cold and hard. Stone floor. She placed her palms on either side of her body and lifted herself up. The room (if she was in a room) seemed to tilt up as she went along. There were no walls she could see, of course. There was only darkness and a stone surface she was sitting on. She flinched as something soft brushed her shoulder but calmed down when she realized it was only her hair. She lifted her hands to her shoulders, suddenly realizing she was very cold, and was mildly surprised to find that she wore nothing on them. Her hands began to travel from her shoulders to her chest, briefly cupping her breasts, to graze down her stomach, to her bare thighs, and down her legs, feeling the little bit of stubble that was beginning to emerge.

_My wand._

Again panic seized her as she realized her wand was nowhere to be seen, as was everything else. Vainly she called out, "Lumos." Her voice wavered. She swallowed and tried again, her voice a little clearer. "Lumos!" Nothing. No light, and no wand. She felt truly naked now. Her hands empty.

"Cissy?" She called out panicked. "Cissy!" Her whole body trembled in the crushing darkness. Time was passing but each second seemed nothing more than a repeat of the previous one. Nothing changed. She shivered, the air remained cold, the floor remained stone, the room, if it was a room, remained dark. Layers upon layers upon layers. And then, there was something.

Bellatrix blinked, unsure if she could trust her eyes. There seemed to be something stirring in the darkness. She watched it, clutching her body hard, grounding herself on the stone floor, steeling herself for _something_. She wasn't at all sure of what she was looking at. Through the darkness she could see a sort of grey shadow. A distorted figure… now two figures… they were getting closer…

"What – how are you here?"

Bellatrix started in shock as one of the grey shadows seemed to address her. "I – I don't know. I don't know where I am." The wispy figure moved towards her, the silent one hung back. Bellatrix felt her heart hammer in her heaving chest. "I don't know where I am." She repeated desperately. "I don't – " She gasped when the shadow loomed near, its formless face above hers. And then suddenly –

"Please." The shadow begged. "Please don't." It wasn't a shadow anymore. Hermione Granger's face looked at her with such agony, blood beginning to dribble from a gash on her forehead, and from a recently broken nose. She was all Bellatrix could see against the backdrop of darkness. Her bloodied face flooded her vision. Bellatrix opened her mouth in a silent scream, and a drop of Hermione's blood fell to land on her slack tongue, as Hermione's slightly parted lips covered her own…

She shut her eyes and welcomed the darkness.

* * *

"Has your sister _completely_ lost her mind?"

"Don't talk about her like that!"

"Like what? Like she's crazy?"

"If you're not going to help, then just…"

The words swam around her head like a heavy fog pressing down on her. She felt crushed. She felt immobile. Weakly she tried to lift her head but there was flash of pain and somehow she was falling down again. Dimly she felt something press upon her thigh. She could barely manage a pitiful moan before something else was pressing on her chest, her stomach, her neck. She was sinking deeper and deeper into sheets. Such nice silk sheets…

* * *

It didn't feel like silk anymore. Bellatrix groaned as she felt the weight of _something_ press down on her. Once again her eyes were opened but she couldn't make out what she was seeing. She tried vainly to shake her head as she felt a heavy load placed upon it, weighing down her neck. _My neck…_ She squirmed, agitated, when she realized she was buried in a golden grainy substance; only her face was momentarily free. She felt something trickle down the back of her head. She shook her hair, a mass of curls drenched in sand.

"HELP!" She managed to cry out, not understanding whom she was calling to. A wave of panic seized her throat. She couldn't think, couldn't remember how she got here. Or where _here _was. All she could see was sand. Sand burying her. Trickling from somewhere above, somewhere she couldn't see. She tried to move, but she couldn't feel her legs, couldn't locate her arms. All she felt were the stirrings of panic in her chest, a tangible fear that ran faster and pumped harder than blood. Her vision was covered with sand, sand, _sand_. "HELP!" She couldn't think about anything, couldn't remember anyone. Her lord, her sister… everyone was gone. Buried.

She coughed, spitting out the rough salty substance that had begun to pile up near her mouth. She felt so heavy, so crushed, she was going to die… finally she was going to die…

"We found it, we found it, please." A monotone voice seemed to echo from far away, yet Bellatrix could feel the hot breath of the speaker directly in her ear. The sand stopped trickling; ceased piling up. Bellatrix breathed, frenzied, unable to comprehend what was happening. She clenched her eyes shut, trying to ignore the stinging pain of the grains of sand stuck beneath her eyelids.

"We only met him tonight." The voice whispered. The echo was gone now, and the hot breath had turned cool and soothing. Slowly Bellatrix opened her eyes, her insides trembling as Hermione Granger pressed her mouth against her ear. "We've never been inside your vault. It isn't the real sword. It's a copy, just a copy…"

"What?" Bellatrix croaked desperately, her mouth dry and cracked. She didn't understand. She couldn't think.

Hermione leaned back, a smirk cutting across her features. "Die, Mudblood." She hissed.

* * *

"Are you mad? You can't stay!"

"She's my _wife_, Lucius. You can't expect me to leave while my wife – "

"She wouldn't even give you a second thought if she were in your position!"

"That's between me and her."

"Oh, you stupid – what do you think the Dark Lord will do to you once he realizes you're absent from the biggest fight of his life? Hmm? Do you think he will spare you, _and_ her because you _love_ her? Do you suppose he will forgive what he sees as treachery because of your love for your wife?"

Bellatrix stirred on the bed, sweat beading her forehead and the voices fell silent. A cool wet towel was applied to her flushed face along with a gentle kiss. Her eyelids fluttered but she was gone before she could make out who it was.

* * *

Bellatrix shivered as the rain soaked her mangy form. Somehow she was standing up, but her knees shook as if they would buckle under her at any minute. Her long curls were matted to her head, falling unceremoniously on her shoulders. She peered through her lashes at her surroundings, but it only seemed to rain on her. Her tongue darted out to catch a passing raindrop.

_Salty. _She thought vaguely.

"They're tears."

Bellatrix turned around to see Hermione watching her, leaning on a stone pillar. The entire place was made out of stone. Bellatrix briefly cast her eyes up to see a grey sky, with clouds of smog passing on by. The rain stopped. She set her sights back on Hermione. She was clad in emerald silk, the material hugging her body as tightly as a lover would. Her wavy hair was pulled up in a loose bun, making her look older than her years. Suddenly Bellatrix realized why she was so cold. She wrapped her arms around herself, hiding her bare breasts. Her nude body was completely soaked.

"I've seen them before, you know." Hermione's voice was tinged with cold amusement. "I wore your body not too long ago." She stayed leaning on the pillar, making no move towards her, yet she had somehow grown closer to where Bellatrix was weakly standing. Their surroundings seemed to have shrunk together, pulling them nearer to each other. Bellatrix watched as Hermione began to stroke the inside of her thigh. "I cupped my hands together, and dunk them into the cauldron. The taste was bitter sweet and spicy. It made my eyes water, and the transformation made me boil all over. It hurt so much, and when I looked into the mirror I was you." She laughed. "I touched the breasts that weren't mine, I fingered the little cunt that had caused so much suffering… I clawed at the flesh of the damned, I bruised everything I could touch…"

Neither had moved but suddenly they were looking into each other's eyes. Hermione's hands moved to cup her face. Bellatrix continued to shiver, continued to stare transfixed at hazel eyes blazing with a fire too terrible to behold. Suddenly Hermione was taller, and her lips lowered onto lips darker than her own. Bellatrix gasped as she felt a prick on her lower lip. A bead of blood slid between both mouths. The emerald silk Hermione wore felt soft and warm against Bellatrix' bare skin. Hermione pulled back and laughed, her hands clenched harder on Bellatrix' face.

"Let's see just how filthy her blood really is."

* * *

"Bella?"

A cool hand was stroking her forehead. Bellatrix frowned, her eyes clenched shut as a deep voice attempted to rouse her from her unconscious state.

"Bella? Darling, you've got to wake up."

Bellatrix opened her eyes to stare into warm hazel ones. "Hermione?" She breathed softly.

"What?"

Bellatrix blinked, her vision clearing to reveal the worried face of her husband. "Rodolphus!" She shot up, and then immediately fell down again as a dull throbbing pain reverberated in her head. "Oh, fuck!" She moaned. "Fuuuuck."

Rodolphus laughed in relief. "Merci mon Dieu, j'ai cru que je t'avais perdue."

Bellatrix frowned; it hurt to try to mentally translate. "You didn't lose me." She groaned and again tried to sit up but her husband held her down. "Rodolphus…" she growled weakly.

"Non, chérie. You have to stay put." His hands gripped her arms firmly, but not enough to hurt, effectively pinning her weakened state to the bed.

She complied, pouting like a child, and relaxed in the bed. The room was tilting and she couldn't make any sense out of what was happening.

"Layers…" she mumbled. Rodolphus gazed at her warily as he let up his hands, seeing that she wasn't going to move.

"What did you say?"

"Layers." Bellatrix repeated clearly. "This isn't one of them. This is – " Her eyes suddenly lit up and she took a look at her surroundings, completely ignoring her bewildered husband.

The room she was in was much smaller than the one she had previously been waking up in. It seemed to be a miniature hospital ring. Bellatrix felt like she had been assaulted by white. The walls were painted white, the floor was white marble, and the one window in the room had white curtains. It wasn't until she looked down at herself that she realized the only thing that wasn't white were the silk sheets she was laying in. These were a bright rich emerald. Bellatrix stared, her hands feeling the soft fabric. Something stirred in her mind, she felt almost seasick and the room tilted a little bit more.

_I clawed at the flesh of the damned; I bruised everything I could touch…_

"Bella? Est-ce que ça va?"

"I'm – I'm fine, Rod." She stretched her mouth to say something more, but was startled to feel how much that hurt. Her whole face felt sore in fact. Lifting a hand, she tentatively traced the fresh scars criss-crossing her face. Her husband watched her uneasily.

"None of us are particularly adept at healing, but Narcissa did her best. It'll probably fully heal in an hour." Bellatrix stared at him quietly. Rodolphus fidgeted on the bed, a hand absently twisting the sheets next to his wife's legs. "Anyway, we've both had worse, haven't we? Remember at school? Avery cursed my finger? None of the teachers would believe that I wasn't flipping them off." He smiled encouragingly at her, but she did not return it.

"Rod… how long have I been out?" _Have I missed the battle? Has today possibly gone on and finished? Has today become… tomorrow?_

"Oh, about… four hours maybe." _God dammit! _ He ran a hand through his hair, while the other continued to twist the sheets. "You scared your sister shitless."

"Where is she now?"

"She – she left." Bellatrix stared harder at Rodolphus. There was something in his tone just then. Like he was trying to be overly casual. A bead of sweat formed at his temple under her harsh gaze and Rodolphus felt just a little hot.

"Where did she go?"

"Out."

"_Rodolphus_…" There was no mistaking the warning of her tone. Rodolphus allowed his wife to sit up and prop herself on the pillows, and despite her weak condition he found himself being cautious with her. He cleared his throat while inching just a little bit away from her.

"Listen, cherie, the battle is set to start soon. We had no idea when you would fully recover, tu comprends? It would be suspicious had you not shown up. The Dark Lord would not have been pleased."

Bellatrix continued to stare. "_Would_ not have been pleased? What has changed?"

"Well, you _are_ there." He looked away and stared at one of many white walls.

Bellatrix struggled to understand. "I _am_ there?"

"Yes." He turned away from the wall and looked meaningfully at her. "Narcissa has – "

"Oh no." Bellatrix clenched her eyes shut as the truth hit her. "Oh no, oh no, oh no." _I've seen them before… I wore your body… _Part of her knew that most likely, whatever would happen to Narcissa wouldn't matter. The day would repeat itself and no harm would be done. But she felt instantly that Narcissa wearing her body was wrong somehow. Like an important clue made distorted. She couldn't understand why she felt that way. Her dream slammed into her mind again and again. There was something important and clear but Bellatrix couldn't make it out. Her vision was blurry.

"Bella? Are you alright?" She focused in on her husband.

"She took Polyjuice Potion?"

"Yes."

"That'll only last for an hour. What then?"

"By that time the Dark Lord will not notice your presence, or lack thereof. Narcissa will revert into her own body and sneak away safely. Later Lucius will tell the Dark Lord that you have fallen."

Bellatrix visibly bristled. "The Dark Lord will not so easily believe such lies. He knows of my abilities." _At least he does not know of how easily a housewife and mudblood can get rid of the infamous Bellatrix Lestrange._ "I have absolutely no intention of staying out of the fight, Rodolphus. I will be better soon. Once Narcissa has changed back I'll show up and take her place as me." She searched his face for an argument but he held himself impassive. "Besides, what about you?"

"What about me?"

"You're here. The Dark Lord will surely notice your absence." Her voice cracked at the end, and she reached a hand for her neck. "My throat is sore." She felt the weight of the bed sink and then rise again as Rodolphus shifted and stood up. She followed him with her eyes, suddenly noticing the table standing near the doorway. An assortment of biscuits, cheese, and jams were spread out along with an empty brown mug. With his back to her Rodolphus conjured warm water, and placed a tea bag into the mug. He swished it around a bit before turning around and heading towards his wife.

"Here." He leaned over her slightly, cupping a hand behind her head and tilting the mug so it touched her lips. "Sip slowly." Bellatrix glared, parted her lips, and took a deep gulp. Rodolphus laughed at her horrified expression as the bitter liquid slid down her throat burning a path all the way down to her stomach. "Knew you'd do that."

"Shut up." She took the mug from him and motioned the hand supporting her head away. He settled back on the bed, his hand now resting on he covered knees. "Answer the question. What are you going to do when The Dark Lord notices you missing?"

Rodolphus smiled, albeit unhappily. "You know, I fell in love with fighting because of you, Bella."

"You flatter me. Now answer the question." She took another small sip of the bitter tea. Her throat still felt a little raw and she was growing irritated with her husband.

"I saw the passion you possessed." He continued. "I saw how I made that come out in you when we dueled, and how the better I fought the more passionate you became. And then the more I was in love with you."

Her head began to swim and she slumped a little more in her bed. Somehow she didn't believe it was Rodolphus' words that had such an effect. "Just answer the question, Rod…" The mug slipped from her hands but Rodolphus smoothly took it from her grasp before it spilled onto her sheets.

"I'm just sorry that I won't be able to see that passion today." He smiled at her, his hands cradling the back of he head as she slipped just a little further into the sheets.

"You bastard…" Bellatrix mumbled, her eyes struggling to stay open. And then, for the fourth time that day, she passed out.

* * *

The potion seemed to have knocked Bellatrix out completely. She had no dreams, just wonderful silence and unconsciousness. When she finally came to, Narcissa's cry was not responsible for rousing her, but the potion just seemed to wear off. She stretched in her bed, the sheets rippling over her form. She couldn't find it in herself to be so very angry at Rodolphus for drugging her, the rest was amazing and much needed. She sat up a little, experimentally widening her jaw and closing it and was pleased to feel that her face felt fine. She looked around her surroundings, her eyes still not used to the oppressive whiteness.

_Has it been so very long? Rodolphus is not back. Cissy is not back. Is it tomorrow? Has the day moved on? Or is the battle still in place?_ She rolled her neck around, feeling the cracks created by stress. _I could stay here. Take a day off from the fighting. _She looked around for her wand; already knowing she could not do that. It was in her nature to fight. She always fought; it was what she was best at. It was why Molly Weasley's triumph stung so much, and confused her. It was why the mudblood had to die the most painful death possible. The dream again slammed into her mind but she could not focus on it. It was too confusing. _Just a dream, just a dream. It does not mean anything._

She slid out from beneath the covers, not seeing her wand anywhere. She made her way to the door, pushed it open, and sighed in relief when the rest of the manor was revealed. No bright white, just elegant wood, bronze, and silver draping the hall. She made her way down the hall, seeking her room, her thin robes trailing after her. Finally she found her room, noting that her sister had seen to it that the shards of glass were gone. Even the bed was made. Bellatrix saw her wand on a pillow and smiled despite herself. No one would have known that a mad woman had been unleashed here. _You should have just waited, Cissy. In hours everything would have been just as it once was._

She picked up her wand, remembering the first time she held it. _Walnut and dragon heartstring. Twelve-and-three-quarter inches. Unyielding._ She had felt so powerful, the rush of magic traveling through her body for the first time. She looked at it for a minute, running the length of it through her hands, and then remembered suddenly, as if someone had whispered it to her, that there was another wand in her room. She turned to the bedside table, and pulled out the drawer. There it was. She had not identified the owner of it. Greyback and his pathetic snatchers had taken it from Potter and his friends. She shivered in memory at the Dark Lord crucifying them all after Potter had escaped. After it was done she had looked over at Draco, impressed that he had not cried when it was done. But then she saw that he was just lying there in shock, his eyes bulging out, his mouth trapped in a silent scream as he twitched in the continuing agony of it all.

_He's just a boy…_

Bellatrix picked up the wand. Vine and Dragon Heartstring. Ten-and-three-quarter inches. She had experimented with it as well. She was surprised to see how well it worked for her, considering she had not won it. She pocketed it on a whim.

In a few more minutes, Bellatrix was dressed in her robes. No one had come back for her, and there was no way she would miss out on the fight. There were so many things buzzing through her head that for once she felt calm.

_Get to the mudblood. The dreams. Sand, blood, stone, glass. Cissy, punch Rod, the Dark Lord… Draco._

She turned on her heel, and then the manor was gone.

* * *

**Author's Note:** Well, this is a bit different from my other chapters. Mainly because the dreams are kind of confusing. My only consolation for you is that by the time I finish this story (and lord only knows when that will be) all the confusions will be resolved. I'm working on chapter five now, I was going to add more to this chapter but I really really wanted to post _something_ and quickly so you all can see that I have not given up on this. I actually have been writing every day, just not fanfiction. Poetry, short stories, and of course essays for school. I'm going to try to update for this story more often... but I think we all know that's not really going to happen.

Hope you at least enjoyed this chapter. Not much action in this one, but that's all for next chapter. Constructive criticism (_CONSTRUCTIVE_, not mean) is always appreciated, as well as any other ideas or speculations you'd like to share with me. Thanks.


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